God is SO good to me! He understands all of my short-comings...the nervous anxiety that creeps up threatening suffocation...the frustration of imperfection...the need for approval and worth. But He doesn't just understand it. In His grace and love for me, He gently pushes my level of comfort, while constantly drawing me closer to Him and His perfect will for me, helping me realize His expectations are more important than the world's...His approval is what really matters. And His timing? WOW!! HIS timing takes my breath away every single time.
His steady hand in our lives is easy to see in the big events, but often hard to really focus on in those small, everyday moments. Today, His hand was strong. His will was clear. And, in a quick moment of thought, the years of stress and disappointment all made sense.
My dreams were never really pushed to the back burner and left forgotten. Instead, they sat there at a slow simmer. Anticipation and drive growing, preparation building at a slower but more in-depth pace. Not only was He preparing me, my husband, and my boys, in His perfect timing, He's also prepared the rest of my world. He's created an environment and placement that is so perfectly suited for what I need at this moment and for this moment alone.
What triggered this reflection that left me trying to hide tears in a crowded training room? Realizing that this school year, though I may be a first-year teacher, I will not be the one on the outside isolated from other more experienced teachers.I will not be the only one clueless. We ALL will be shuffling through new Common Core standards that are not part of the veteran repertoire. We ALL will be facing a brand new evaluation system, We ALL will be using new software to perform certain procedures.
Either way, we're all in it together.
In addition to the above mentioned crying...lack of hormone regulation following all the excitement and heartache of the spring/early summer left me nearly bawling over this video. Makes me so proud to be the mom of 3 bitty boys. I can't find the exact video we watched...that was SO much better than any on youtub...but ...
take a look @ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StAxfSnpG_M
Showing posts with label LOVE. Show all posts
Showing posts with label LOVE. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Saturday, July 28, 2012
You Can Do It!
Excuse the upcoming all-caps for a moment...it's warranted...I promise.
I LOVE MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND I THANK GOD FOR EACH OF YOU!
Sprinkled throughout my first day of training were sweet messages from a few of those closest to me. In the midst of my over-thinking, God new just what I needed to break me away from my self doubt.
"good luck today! you will do great!"
"Hope its a great day of learning for you!"
And my favorite, "i seriously hope your phone is turned off or on vibrate, but wanted to tell you i love you and am super proud of you!!!"
Most of my anxiety related more to meeting new people rather than whether or not I could actually do my job. It was high school all over again. I was never the one anyone really chose as a friend. I always felt awkward and on the outside of every conversation. My insecurity often comes across as a less than flattering B word that ends with itch. I didn't eat lunch alone either day so I'll consider that a success.
So....what have I learned after sitting in a room with about 130 other new teachers? If you try, you can learn something from anybody and any situation. Even if you are learning exactly what not to do. It's all about perspective and what you make of it. Also, yes, my brain still works and is able to conjure up things learned long ago just as if I'd learned them yesterday.
And in other news, the babysitter is still alive, as are the kids. The house is still standing and no authorities were called. The sitter even agreed to come back this coming week. While sodas and snacks were consumed when they shouldn't have and powdered creamer dusted the better part of my kitchen, overall ...all is good.
Ok, back to watching the Olympics! By the way, how great was the men's road race today! Loved getting to see so much of the London scenery. BEAUTIFUL!
I LOVE MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND I THANK GOD FOR EACH OF YOU!
Sprinkled throughout my first day of training were sweet messages from a few of those closest to me. In the midst of my over-thinking, God new just what I needed to break me away from my self doubt.
"good luck today! you will do great!"
"Hope its a great day of learning for you!"
And my favorite, "i seriously hope your phone is turned off or on vibrate, but wanted to tell you i love you and am super proud of you!!!"
Most of my anxiety related more to meeting new people rather than whether or not I could actually do my job. It was high school all over again. I was never the one anyone really chose as a friend. I always felt awkward and on the outside of every conversation. My insecurity often comes across as a less than flattering B word that ends with itch. I didn't eat lunch alone either day so I'll consider that a success.
So....what have I learned after sitting in a room with about 130 other new teachers? If you try, you can learn something from anybody and any situation. Even if you are learning exactly what not to do. It's all about perspective and what you make of it. Also, yes, my brain still works and is able to conjure up things learned long ago just as if I'd learned them yesterday.
And in other news, the babysitter is still alive, as are the kids. The house is still standing and no authorities were called. The sitter even agreed to come back this coming week. While sodas and snacks were consumed when they shouldn't have and powdered creamer dusted the better part of my kitchen, overall ...all is good.
Ok, back to watching the Olympics! By the way, how great was the men's road race today! Loved getting to see so much of the London scenery. BEAUTIFUL!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Fumbling Through Pages...and life
"Everybody turn with me to..."
It's Sunday morning and there I was in church fumbling through pages in my Bible and trying to quickly get myself to the same passage my pastor was already reading. Today it was Matthew 7:24-26 and I was struggling with distraction. Distraction from everything!
--could I see Pastor Steve or was I going to have to watch him on the screen (and possible deal with the sound/sight delay)
--where's my pen
--my pants are too tight and my lips are chapped
--and the inevitable can the person in front of me smell my coffee breath which then had me reaching for my purse to grab some gum ~after taking another sip of my coffee~.
I guess something or someone really didn't want me hear the message today.(Yeah, Satan, I'm talking about you so you better listen up!)
Just when I thought everything was in order, I turn the page to the start of Matthew chapter 7 and there I go again reading a devotional at the top of the page rather than going straight to the correct verse. Fortunately, my God was able to overcome my distraction. And, boy, did he ever!!!
Last night, I sat crying over all the crazy dreams and desires and life experiences and yada yada yada. Too much to want and be. Too little time and money to do it. Flopping around like a fish out of water. Unable to go, do, be, ...
Just before bed, when all is suppose to be winding down and getting quiet, my heart/brain pops into overdrive. Why do I have to a flopper? I can make a ~Want~Wish~Dream~Hope~Give~Do~BE!!!~Bucket List. Right? RIGHT?? By the way, you totally have to do the Stevie Wonder head shaking thing and sway your body when you read that!
Couple that with a message ~SO PERFECT~ and even that distracting little devotional which I will be studying later since it's titled PRIORITIES: Planning Your Days...lets just say my head is being held PRETTY high right now. I'm quite certain this high, like many highs in life, will be followed by a low or two, BUT the ride should be interesting.
God, as always, intends great things for me. Even in the little, day-to-day things...He has a plan and gives me the desire and ability to fulfill His plan. It's the dreams and wishes of my heart that will help keep me moving and growing.
So...stay tuned...
It's Sunday morning and there I was in church fumbling through pages in my Bible and trying to quickly get myself to the same passage my pastor was already reading. Today it was Matthew 7:24-26 and I was struggling with distraction. Distraction from everything!
--could I see Pastor Steve or was I going to have to watch him on the screen (and possible deal with the sound/sight delay)
--where's my pen
--my pants are too tight and my lips are chapped
--and the inevitable can the person in front of me smell my coffee breath which then had me reaching for my purse to grab some gum ~after taking another sip of my coffee~.
I guess something or someone really didn't want me hear the message today.(Yeah, Satan, I'm talking about you so you better listen up!)
Just when I thought everything was in order, I turn the page to the start of Matthew chapter 7 and there I go again reading a devotional at the top of the page rather than going straight to the correct verse. Fortunately, my God was able to overcome my distraction. And, boy, did he ever!!!
Last night, I sat crying over all the crazy dreams and desires and life experiences and yada yada yada. Too much to want and be. Too little time and money to do it. Flopping around like a fish out of water. Unable to go, do, be, ...
Just before bed, when all is suppose to be winding down and getting quiet, my heart/brain pops into overdrive. Why do I have to a flopper? I can make a ~Want~Wish~Dream~Hope~Give~Do~BE!!!~Bucket List. Right? RIGHT?? By the way, you totally have to do the Stevie Wonder head shaking thing and sway your body when you read that!
Couple that with a message ~SO PERFECT~ and even that distracting little devotional which I will be studying later since it's titled PRIORITIES: Planning Your Days...lets just say my head is being held PRETTY high right now. I'm quite certain this high, like many highs in life, will be followed by a low or two, BUT the ride should be interesting.
God, as always, intends great things for me. Even in the little, day-to-day things...He has a plan and gives me the desire and ability to fulfill His plan. It's the dreams and wishes of my heart that will help keep me moving and growing.
So...stay tuned...
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Old Lady? I think not!
While the kids are busy with school and Dad's at work, Mom and Gavin are isolated to the house day after day. Gavin is ignoring me more and more, so it's time to find something to do. Old hobbies...here I come.
Many, many years ago my Aunt Nina taught me how to crochet, but I did nothing with it. Then, my Grandma Pickett taught me how to knit a scarf. Again, nothing. I bought a sewing machine with the intention of being that great mom who makes cute outfits for her kiddos and saves so much money because she can repair holes in clothes, blah blah blah. NADA.
I love being creative and crafty... but have NOTHING to show for that love.
Well, not anymore!
My hands have been idle for far too long. So...knitting it is.
I started with what I know best: A simple cast on, followed by knitting row after row to create a scarf. It's not too bad, but very boring and I am tired of scarves. Yes, I know it is the most basic place to start--but I've got it and want to move on.
... ... ...
What's next?
Many web pages later, I settled on a knitted pencil case. Though I certainly don't need one, I thought I could use the pattern, make it a bit larger, and create a bag to keep all my knitting supplies in. This is what it should look like.
Not knowing anything about picking out yarn, I spent at least an hour walking up and down the aisles at Michaels. I probably looked like a weird, crazy lady walking in circles, rubbing yarn after yarn. I settled on a Lion Brand Yarn that is organic cotton. It's soft and not itchy...which is definitely a must in my opinion.
On size 13 needles, this yarn produced a very stretchy bag, with a large gauge. It's a bit sloppy and does NOT hide any imperfections. Here, you see what the piece looked like after knitting the pattern, using Stockinette Stitch. The ends are so messy. I'm not exactly sure what happened. Also, since I added the stripes on my own and wasn't really paying attention to the number of rows for each color, the stripes are very uneven.
I have this strange obsession with the inside of bags, purses, etc. The inside has to be just as cute, if not cuter, than the outside or I won't buy it. Many great purses have been passed by because the inside liner didn't "speak to me". That's not the case with this bag. The inside is by far my favorite part.
The end result is a slightly sloppy, but cute bag that is nothing like the original picture associated with the pattern. Not only did I try to enlarge the pattern, I also added more difficulty that I was ready for by doing stripes using 2 different colored yarns instead of using a self-striping yarn. OH...I also had to hand-sew the fabric lining and zipper for this one. YEP-TOTALLY CRAZY! But, I actually completed a project from start to finish. Exciting! I now have something to show.
Many, many years ago my Aunt Nina taught me how to crochet, but I did nothing with it. Then, my Grandma Pickett taught me how to knit a scarf. Again, nothing. I bought a sewing machine with the intention of being that great mom who makes cute outfits for her kiddos and saves so much money because she can repair holes in clothes, blah blah blah. NADA.
I love being creative and crafty... but have NOTHING to show for that love.
Well, not anymore!
My hands have been idle for far too long. So...knitting it is.
I started with what I know best: A simple cast on, followed by knitting row after row to create a scarf. It's not too bad, but very boring and I am tired of scarves. Yes, I know it is the most basic place to start--but I've got it and want to move on.... ... ...
What's next?
Many web pages later, I settled on a knitted pencil case. Though I certainly don't need one, I thought I could use the pattern, make it a bit larger, and create a bag to keep all my knitting supplies in. This is what it should look like.Not knowing anything about picking out yarn, I spent at least an hour walking up and down the aisles at Michaels. I probably looked like a weird, crazy lady walking in circles, rubbing yarn after yarn. I settled on a Lion Brand Yarn that is organic cotton. It's soft and not itchy...which is definitely a must in my opinion.
On size 13 needles, this yarn produced a very stretchy bag, with a large gauge. It's a bit sloppy and does NOT hide any imperfections. Here, you see what the piece looked like after knitting the pattern, using Stockinette Stitch. The ends are so messy. I'm not exactly sure what happened. Also, since I added the stripes on my own and wasn't really paying attention to the number of rows for each color, the stripes are very uneven.
I have this strange obsession with the inside of bags, purses, etc. The inside has to be just as cute, if not cuter, than the outside or I won't buy it. Many great purses have been passed by because the inside liner didn't "speak to me". That's not the case with this bag. The inside is by far my favorite part.The end result is a slightly sloppy, but cute bag that is nothing like the original picture associated with the pattern. Not only did I try to enlarge the pattern, I also added more difficulty that I was ready for by doing stripes using 2 different colored yarns instead of using a self-striping yarn. OH...I also had to hand-sew the fabric lining and zipper for this one. YEP-TOTALLY CRAZY! But, I actually completed a project from start to finish. Exciting! I now have something to show.
Friday, January 21, 2011
2011...it that you?
Did 2010 really end that quick?
Yep...
Over the course of two moves, job changes, and all the other craziness of 2010, we've sort of forgotten about having fun and enjoying life. So, 2011 is all about getting back to having fun and enjoying God's blessings. We're breaking out old hobbies, creating new ones, and actually doing more than sitting around.
First up...what to do when school gets closed for an entire week due to a little snow and A LOT of ice? It's a good thing there is a fresh supply of Christmas presents to keep everyone entertained.
With what seemed like a million tiny pieces of plastic connectors spread all over the TV room floor, we set out building a HUGE, double ferris wheel. Not an easy task.
Morgan and Christian are great engineers. They worked really hard looking at the instruction pictures and following all the tedious steps needed to create their masterpiece.
They only needed a little help and a bunch of encouragement from mom to finish.
After two days, we finally completed the giant, double ferris wheel. It is now proudly displayed in the living room.
Up next, mom's wearing her glasses all the time and turning into an old lady. :)
Yep...
Over the course of two moves, job changes, and all the other craziness of 2010, we've sort of forgotten about having fun and enjoying life. So, 2011 is all about getting back to having fun and enjoying God's blessings. We're breaking out old hobbies, creating new ones, and actually doing more than sitting around.
First up...what to do when school gets closed for an entire week due to a little snow and A LOT of ice? It's a good thing there is a fresh supply of Christmas presents to keep everyone entertained.
With what seemed like a million tiny pieces of plastic connectors spread all over the TV room floor, we set out building a HUGE, double ferris wheel. Not an easy task.
Morgan and Christian are great engineers. They worked really hard looking at the instruction pictures and following all the tedious steps needed to create their masterpiece.
They only needed a little help and a bunch of encouragement from mom to finish.
After two days, we finally completed the giant, double ferris wheel. It is now proudly displayed in the living room.
Up next, mom's wearing her glasses all the time and turning into an old lady. :)
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